Look in your (spiritual) mirror

Posted on by
Reply

Participating as a wizpert gives me the chance to help folks see how our Spirituality speaks to us through our daily experiences. A mirror shows us our reflection. Spiritual mirroring shows us something about ourselves through our daily interactions. So often, when we have a disturbance with a person or situation, we look outside of ourselves to try and find a solution. We generally want the person or situation to change. If we realize that these events are opportunities for us to reflect on the inside, then we change the perception of the situation immediately. We can ask ourselves, “What is this person or experience trying to show me?” The answers are often that we need to make a change in how we think, feel or act. We may need to speak up for ourselves or change how we interact with someone to effect a different experience.

For example, many of us find ourselves in social settings where we don’t say what we really want because we are being polite. Later, we may secretly feel frustrated, let down, rejected, etc. because we didn’t speak our truth in the situation. Sometimes it can be helpful to discuss what life is mirroring to us and what new actions we may choose to take with a neutral person. Asking a Wizpert for feedback is one way to “check your thinking” about a life dilemma. In this way, you can receive more information that can help create a new approach. The more we identify and make peace with the mirrors in our lives the happier we will be!

Tammi Rider

Love you before loving him/her

Posted on by
Reply

One of the most common questions people ask me is: why did my partner leave and how can I get them back? Well, let’s start from the beginning. The most important relationship to your romantic relationship is the relationship that you have with yourself. If that relationship is not right, all other relationships will have trouble. Self-love is a good starting point taught in psychology for developing a right relationship with yourself. Just how are you treating yourself may be how others are treating you. The simple fact is that you do not have to do anything to deserve love. Take a little baby for instance. The baby doesn’t have to do anything to deserve love it just does. The concept is the same when learning to parent your inner child and give it the love it needs.

There are basically two types of love: conditional love (love with conditions) and unconditional love. Conditional love is ego-centered and we must ask how we are loving ourselves. Is it love with conditions or unconditional and spiritual love? If we don’t do this the ego steps in and says that we have to have certain physical items, look and act a certain way, etc., which are all examples of conditional love.

There are basically two ways to parent your inner child. Either one is too firm or too permissive. The key and balancing point is to be firm and unconditional loving with yourself in all instances. If you are too critical with yourself the child will feel deflated and unworthy. On the other hand if you are too permissive and spoiling you will have a child who is rebellious. A firm and loving parent creates a balanced child who is ready to accept changes when needed.

10 Affirmations To Promote Self-Love (Provided by Dr. Joshua David Stone, PhD)

1. I love and forgive myself totally for all my mistakes, for I now recognize that mistakes are positive, not negative.

2. I now fully recognize that I have worth because God created me, and I do not have to do anything to have it.

3. I now recognize that I am a diamond, not the mud on the diamond.

4. My worth is unchangingly positive because it is a spiritual inheritance. It is not increased by my success nor decreased by my mistakes.

5. I realize now that I have total worth and value as a person whether I learn my lessons in life or not.

6. I now recognize that everything that has ever happened in my life has been positive, because it all contained lessons I needed to learn.

7. I choose to live in the ʺnowʺ and not hold the past against myself.

8. I hereby choose to approve of myself, so I do not have to go around seeking approval from others.

9. I deserve love because God created me, and my mistakes are not held against me.

10. I realize that everything that happens in life is a teaching, a lesson, a challenge, and an opportunity to grow.

Dustin Matlock
Spiritual Coach and Relationship Expert

5 tips for a better relationship with food

Posted on by

We all have a relationship with our food, and as with any relationship it requires attention. How we relate to our food is reflected in our bodies, minds and hearts.

What we eat is very important – yet how we eat is also very important.

Food is like a prism; showing us the full spectrum of how we live our lives, it’s not just about the food!

How we eat is a reflection of how we live and what is important to us. With this in mind we can use our meals and snacking as a metaphor for our lives. Generally speaking food becomes a metaphor when we over or under eat, yet we can use the eating experience as a mirror into our deeper selves at any time – So let’s check in and see how we’re doing.

Try these 5 techniques today and any time you feel that your eating is off or you wonder what’s up nutritionally and or emotionally.

Being aware – without judgment – is the first step to improving our health and wellness!

1. Check your hunger level when you begin to eat. Just notice it. Remember there is no reason to judge what is or isn’t happening, just simply notice. (Be careful not to judge that you wanted to judge!

2. Check in with your environment. Where we eat says a lot about our relationship with not only our food, but ourselves. Eating on the run, standing at the counter or eating in the car are interesting milieus considering we are attempting to nourish ourselves.

3. Check what you have chosen to eat at this particular meal. Yes the choice is important on a macro and micro nutrient level and what we eat says a lot about how we live our lives. Fast foods, home-cooked foods, brown bag vegan or sampling food off others plates, low fat, low carb, paleo – whatever it is that you are choosing to eat – should be noticed.

4. Check the speed of the meal. Eating faster than a speeding bullet has become the norm, yet our bodies have not learned to digest and get the message of satiety to our brains that quickly

5. Check in with the belly area to notice the fullness level. If you are eating fast this will probably come only at the end of the meal but ideally checking in for where your hunger and fullness is will be an ongoing process throughout the meal. If you are putting your fork down in between bites you will have plenty of opportunity and reminder to check in.

These 5 simple reminders are related by awareness – by simply noticing. Nothing more needs to be done or forced.

Being present with your actions when you are eating, noting when you are not present and learning to be curious about these things will move your relationship to a new level organically.

No judgment, no punishment – simply noticing.

Why not pick a meal today and use the ways listed to have a curious look at your relationship with food?

For more ideas and information on nutrition for your body mind and spirit visit me on Wizpert! Also, check out my blog.

Wizpert is a platform for everyday advice that connects people with experts on a variety of topics. To chat with Gina or one of our other wizperts, click the button below.

Spring Cleaning for Your Relationship?

Posted on by
Reply

Since the weather or “season” has changed to Spring, I’ve noticed a trend in the changes clients are making to their lives.
Many Wizpert users I connected with this week have made the decision to spring clean their relationships now.
Recently I was assisting a user who was sensing a need to spring clean his life, and informed me of tasks already completed so far. He was stuck for things to try. We brainstormed ideas and came up with some realistic solutions.
Another user I assisted asked about how to make his Wife happier. One user wanted to end her negative relationship as she was suffering with low self-esteem. I encouraged her to consider some gentle ideas around confidence building.
One man wanted to work on his impatience so he would enjoy dating more, instead of wanting to rush his relationships. These are my favourite types of Wizpert users.
Each call is so different, and I love to help.
Wizpert is truly proving to be a great way of connecting with people in crisis; drilling down into their issue, generating workable solutions, and making the client feel important. Some users connect with me three times in one afternoon to update me, and I’m happy to be of service.
Ruby Binns-Cagney

Wizpert is a platform for everyday advice that connects people with experts on a variety of topics. To chat with Ruby or one of our other wizperts, click the button below.

What your doctor won’t tell you

Posted on by
Reply

7 EASY STEPS TO STRENGTHENING YOUR IMMUNE SYSTEM:

1.  Eat Alkalizing Foods- Eat more fresh, raw organic vegetables.

2.  Stop Eating Acid Producing Foods- Cut out sugar! Stop eating wheat. Stop eating grains. Stop drinking coffee and alcohol. All of these are highly acidic.

3.  Eat Superfoods- These are potent foods rich in nutrients. Have a superfood smoothie everyday.

4.  Eat Coconut Oil Daily- It is one of the cleanest sources of high frequency fuel for your body. It is anti-bacterial and anti-viral. Great in smoothies and to protect your skin.

5.  Expose Your Skin to Sunlight- Vitamin D from the sun is crucial for immune system function. There is no substitute for natural sunlight! 15-20 minutes is all you need.

6.  Get More Sleep- Most people are sleep deprived. The body repairs itself and recovers when we sleep. 8-10 hour per night is optimal.

7.  Reduce Stress- Meditate Daily for 5-30 minutes. Try this quick meditation that you can do anytime.

- Mary

Wizpert is a platform for everyday advice that connects people with experts on a variety of topics. To chat with Mary or one of our other wizperts, click the button below.

I’m gonna make you love me

Posted on by
Reply

When I was a little girl, my parents used to listen to Diana Ross songs and I would sing along pretending to be, “The Boss”. One song in particular had the chorus, “I’m gonna make you love me, oh, yes I will, yes I will…”. As a child, I never considered what that meant until I entered adolescence and became an adult. I eventually learned the lesson that you cannot “make” anyone to love you. My encounters with Wizpert clients reinforce this concept.

I continuously attempt to teach others this lesson as we discuss the topic of relationships. They want to “make them understand” or “make them see” certain things regarding who they are and what they want from a relationship and how they are going to obtain it from that other individual. These individuals are not taking into consideration or respecting the concept of “free will”. How can anyone expect for someone to remain in a relationship when the desire to impose his or her will upon the other individual?

One of the many benefits of being a Wizpert is the opportunity to help other individuals to gain insight into their wants, needs, and desires as they come to terms with the status of their relationships. Helping them to understand that both parties in a relationship has free will to pursue peace and happiness is important. They cannot force someone to stay when their mind and heart is already out the door. I advocate personal development and I believe that no matter the status of a relationship, an individual can be a champion in the situation as they take what has occurred and use it as a means of growth. If that growth results in saving the relationship, than that is an advantage. If that growth does not result in saving the relationship, it provides the individual with a certain level of peace and the opportunity to apply those lessons learned in another healthy relationship.

In the end, everyone who is in a relationship should learn that no one is, “The Boss.”

Donetta D. Quinones, MS, CHBC

Wizpert is a platform for everyday advice that connects people with experts on a variety of topics. To chat with Donetta or one of our other wizperts, click the button below.

The bliss and blisters of coding

Posted on by
Reply

Joseph Campbell coined the term “follow your bliss” in his studies around mythology that eventually brought us “The Hero’s Journey”. The Hero’s Journey is a pattern of stories told across the planet that hold to a typical pattern of a hero, plunged into chaos and eventually resurfacing with a prize that benefits society.

Much later when students took Joseph’s “follow your bliss” quote to be encouraging hedonism, Campbell is reported to have grumbled, “I should have said, ‘Follow your blisters.’” I find myself thinking that “follow your blisters” could have been just as easily misconstrued as promoting masochism.

I absolutely love both phrases, as they capture something essential about embracing my passions in life. If only Joseph has said “Follow your bliss through the blisters”.

My bliss is software development.

How do I know it’s bliss? The easiest test is what happens to my experience of time when I am coding. It vanishes. I step into a landscape of abstraction and formalism, and finally surface hours later with nothing to tell me that hours have passed except that the body itself has started to complain so loudly about the lack of food, sleep, etc that it’s no longer something the bliss can fully mask in a sense of timelessness.

But the most important test for whether it’s bliss is what happens when I hit a blockage of some sort. It’s those moments of fear when faced with a challenge I suspect will involve pain. It’s knowing full well that there are blisters coming. It’s knowing that this is such a passion that I’ll happily accept those blisters as a price for further honing my craft. It’s looking forward to the blisters, because they’re an essential part of experiencing the passion.

So. My bliss is software development. I’d love to help you with your blisters, on the off chance that you and I end up sharing the same bliss.

- Lindsay

Wizpert is a platform for everyday advice that connects people with experts on a variety of topics. To chat with Lindsay or one of our other wizperts, click the button below.

The dynamics of major life events

Posted on by
Reply

I became a Wizpert just over a month ago. I honestly was not sure what to expect when I agreed to deliver advice to members over Skype. I was a bit nervous about whether I would be well received or not. I think anyone would be in that situation. It seems almost arrogant to call myself a relationship and personal growth “expert” although I have to admit I have had a lot of experience in both areas. I lost my mom last year to cancer and I have been through divorce, single parenthood and remarriage. I understand the dynamics involved in major life events.

I am so glad I took a chance on this new adventure. I have handled many calls and all of them are unique. I am so humbled when someone asks if they can favorite me. I have had a few people come back and tell me that I was very helpful and the let me know how their problems turned out. The fact that they felt I helped them enough that they wanted to return and thank me means so much.

The requests for advice range from unrequited love to learning to let go of a relationship that no longer “Works”. I love helping my clients look into their hearts and see what it is they really want or need in their relationships. I like to remind people that we are all worthy of love and respect. I find most of my clients know what they need to do and they just want a little support from a neutral party to help solidify their decisions. I find this is a great way to give back for all the love and support I received from others in my own life. Sometimes you just need someone to tell you “It’s okay! You are making a good decision” or “you need to do what is best for you”. That is what I am here for!

I am truly honored to be a Wizpert!

- Melissa

Wizpert is a platform for everyday advice that connects people with experts on a variety of topics. To chat with Melissa or one of our other wizperts, click the button below.

Internet Marketing for Small Business

Posted on by
Reply

The Internet has changed the way we do business. As a result, small business owners must think globally, instead of locally. Globalization is a word we hear frequently, but what does it mean? Webster’s says it is the development of an integrated economy characterized by free trade, the free flow of capital, and access to cheaper foreign labor markets. I will break that down even more and word it as follows: Because we can all communicate cheaply and easily, your competitors are now all over the world.
What does that mean for the small business owner? It means that not only do you have to compete with big box retailers like Wal-Mart, Best Buy & Target; you also have to compete with other small businesses around the world. Just as easily as your customer finds you around the corner, they can find a competitor offering possibly the same products at a cheaper price online. Luckily, the same globalization that increased competition also provides you with opportunities to grab some additional customers for yourself. Globalization isn’t one-sided, small business owners can benefit from it as well. The question is how? That’s where I come in.

Marketing and advertising have come a long way. No longer do we strive to sell customers goods and services they don’t need to make a quick buck. While those shady characters will certainly still exist, they won’t last very long. The paradigms in marketing have changed from transactions to relationships. As a business owner, you no longer sell just a product or service to a customer. Social media platforms like Twitter and Facebook, as well as having a company website, enable you to be a part of your customer’s day-to-day routine. Search engine marketing enables you to target new customers through the use of queries or keywords. As an Independent Marketing Consultant I help small business owners find their places in the new world economy through strategic planning, integrated marketing, and comprehensive campaign optimization and analysis for the highest return on investment.

Are you ready?

Tiffany M White, MBA, DBA (ABD)
Internet Marketing Expert

Wizpert is a platform for everyday advice that connects people with experts on a variety of topics. To chat with Tiffany or one of our other wizperts, click the button below.

It’s your time: COMMIT OR QUIT!

Posted on by
Reply

Time. What is time? God’s gift to us every day. Are you using your time for your purpose or wasting your time on irrelevant things? Often we hear people say tomorrow isn’t promised or we even say it ourselves. If we all truly believe this why do we take time for granted? Commit or quit helps with this. You’re either going to commit to the cause or quit.

Career: If you don’t see your job going anywhere, COMMIT OR QUIT!

Relationships: If you know deep down inside you can’t or won’t spend the rest of your life with this person, COMMIT OR QUIT!

Happiness: We all should have it. Half of the time we settle for unhappiness because of comfort. There are over 8 billion people in the world. There is someone out there for you. COMMIT OR QUIT!

You control your happiness. Being alone is better than dealing with someone that’s unfaithful, disloyal and keeping you unhappy. COMMIT OR QUIT!

Stop complaining and start working toward change. You can’t keep doing the same things over and over from your past thinking you’re going to have a new future. It doesn’t work like that. Make a change, and that includes people. COMMIT OR QUIT!

At the end of the day you’re responsible for your own life. If you’re not truly happy and living the best, peaceful, blessed and happy life, take a look in the mirror and make some changes.

- Author Terry Bams

Wizpert is a platform for everyday advice that connects people with experts on a variety of topics. To chat with Terry or one of our other wizperts, click the button below.